Thursday, October 1, 2009

Diving into the Unknown

As many of you know, Ashton and I have been planning on moving out of Utah come November when our apartment lease is up. So, Ashton started looking at job options back in August and soon after started applying for jobs. Although we have a general idea of where we'd like to end up (he's got his favorites, I've got mine), but we applied for jobs in multiple states. Even States we don't really want to end up in. A job is a job.

Well, we've had no responses yet on the job front. Not one reply. It's been kind of discouraging and we started thinking that maybe we'd have to stay here. After talking to his boss, Ashton discovered last week that his job most likely won't be there for him after November. Not because they don't like him or anything, but because of a lack of funding (the company that he works for is funded by grants). I found out a couple days later. That news made things more stressful. Now we can't just sit back and think, well if Ashton doesn't get a new job, he's got a job already and we can just renew our lease or maybe try to find a new apartment. Ashton needs to find a new job by November.

The hardest part of this news came down mostly to what to do about our living situation. There were so many options to consider. Do we stay in our apartment and renew our lease for a few months? How long should we renew it for? Should we put in our 60 day notice and hope that Ashton gets a new job? What will we do if he doesn't get a new job? We spent a day or two talking about it. Discussing our different options, our first impressions on what should be done, thoughts, feelings, etc. Thankfully, we had been planning on going to the temple this week, which was just in time since we had to make a decision by today in order to put our 60 days in if that's what we decided.

I love the temple. There's no other place that's more peaceful. Although I was a bit stressed about getting an answer, as answers don't always come when we want them to, I was happy as I entered the temple. Fortunately, we did get an answer and thankfully we both got the same answer. We're putting in our 60 day notice and moving to some unknown location in November.

Although we both feel good about our decision and know that everything will work out, it's still scary. It almost feels like plunging into a dark room that you aren't familiar with. You don't know if there's going to be furniture in there, where it is, how tall it is, or even how big the room actually is. It's enough to make you move forward cautiously. Even moving around in a room you are familiar with is dangerous. I can't tell you how many times I've hit my head on the side of the closet door because it was open and I couldn't see it.

I'm also thankful that this decision has come right before General Conference. Hearing inspiring messages from the Lord's servants is a great way to soothe troubled feelings. I love General Conference. Such a great way to spend a weekend.

This may be the scariest decision we've made yet since we don't know how it's going to turn out. We have great support though and family that'd be willing to help if we needed it. For right now though, we're diving into the unknown.

5 comments:

Emily S. said...

I'm sure that everything will come clear to you both. Good thing you are relying on the right sources to help out with this hard decision!

Janis said...

There was a talk by a General Authority years ago about taking a step(maybe even a few steps) into the dark before we see the light. Trusting in Heavenly Father's guidance is scarey and awesome. It's scarey to let go and let Him guide us. It's awesome to realize that He has a plan for us. Enjoy the trip!!!!

Tara said...

Sounds familiar... I know that you'll be blessed for following the promptings you've received as answers to your questions. The Lord knows what he's doing and the outcome will be worth it! Hang in there!

Anjanette said...

It is scary to have the unknown, but most of our lives is the unknown and you made it to here so you definitley will make it on. Look at it as an adventure and just be very proactive. We'll miss you guys, especially Katelyn.

Jen Bowen said...

It's always so comforting when you get the same answer after praying. Good luck with the uncertainty and we'll be praying that Ashton finds a really good job. Keep us posted on where you end up.